Dating tips for young adults

There are many things religion can provide for the soul – spiritual guidance, personal meaning and a relationship with God (if you are so inclined), just to name a few. However, when it comes to matters of the pants, religion can leave something to be desired.

Many religions preach abstinence until marriage, monogamy, chastity, etc. If you haven’t read the news lately, this doesn’t exactly describe today’s teens (whatever they aren’t doing with their peers, they are apparently doing with their teachers). So, sometimes those seeking religious guidance as they enter the dating world are out of luck.

Well, worry no more. As a public service, I decided to review some commonly used guidelines and pick out the most relevant ones for today’s teens.

How to Ask Someone Out (usually for the boys)

• Be creative when you prepare your dates. Boys should be the ones asking the ladies out. Have fun with your invitation.
• Balloons – Fill three balloons up with helium and a message regarding the invitation. Attach 100 yards of kite string to them and let ‘em sore. (ed. note – sore?)
• M&M’s – This is a tough one. Take a couple of peanut M&M’s and carefully crack them open. Replace the peanut with a tiny message (on a tiny roll of paper) and glue (use a baking substance of some sort; we don’t want to kill your date) the M&M back together. Put it in a bag and write instructions on what your potential has to do to find the invitation.
• Trash – Wad the message up and toss it in a garbage sack with other clean trash. Deliver it with a small note to your date-to-be’s doorstep.
• Radio Station Announcement – A girl named Jenna got asked out to prom at 6:00 am over the local radio station.

In summary, if you aren’t covering your potential date with trash or waking her up at 6 AM, you should disassemble an M&M, fill it with tiny magic paper, reassemble it with tiny edible glue, then give it to her. Most guys at this age are more worried about unhooking a bra than dissecting the genius of Forrest Mars, Sr., but I digress.

Now that we’ve covered the vaguely helpful methods to get a date, I would like to review the unintentionally hilarious things you can do on a date.

Guaranteed Good-Time Date Suggestions

• Kool-Aide Party – Find games and activities to do on a warm evening and have a Kool-Aide (non-alcoholic) Party.
• Fishing – Take your date fishing for a relaxing time. Don’t go too far away and let someone know your location. Fishing as a group date is perfect. It is safe and exciting.
• Read Dr. Seuss – In a comfortable group setting pick your favorite Dr. Seuss book and take turns reading it aloud.

Poorly Worded Date Suggestions

• The Pool Hall – If you are a bit competitive in nature, go play pool. Find a pool hall that provides a cheerful atmosphere, get some refreshments and chat as you fine-tune your ball skills.
• Slip and Slide – Like to have summer water fun? Set up your brother and sister’s slip and slide and go crazy in the yard (best done in groups).
• Give Service – Conjure up a service-based activity. There are many out there to be done. Mow someone’s lawn, clean a home, or go door to door looking for canned food for the needy.

Women certainly do love to fine tune their ball skills while giving service. Moving right along.

In case this didn’t explain everything you need to know about dating, here are some frequently asked questions:

Q: What do girls like to do?
It depends on the girl. Athletic girls enjoy athletic activities, many girls don’t (ed. note – so true!). Find out what they enjoy by talking to them. Ask them what they enjoy doing after school activities or who they hang out with and where they go. Nearly all girls love to laugh.

Q: How should I say “Good night”?
It depends on your date and how well you know them. A first date can end with the tip of a hat and a smile or it may end with a hug. If you think a hug appropriate, ask your date. They will be cool enough to tell you. Subsequent dates will be more comfortable but you should never feel forced into anything. If you are not comfortable with something, make it known. Don’t push anything on your date. A simple “good night” never hurt anyone.

Q: Where are the moral limits?
If you have to question the activity it is probably out of line–find something else to do. Stay clear of the moral line. Talk to your parents or bishop about what is or isn’t appropriate.

I hope this is helpful to some of my younger readers out there. Now that you’re fully educated, make sure to ask your date’s father if you may, with her consent, offer her a tip of your hat.

(Thanks to Mary for the source material)