Live blogging the All Star Game

Hi everyone and welcome to my first ever live blog at 3WC. I will be doing this along with Van Buren Boy and noted Kabbalah scholar Dave, along with fellow Van Buren Boy and cousin-of-note Brett. Feel free to IM/text/email comments at any time.

Thanks to everyone who watched/participated. To see the full chat (in reverse chronological order), just click “More” below.

UPDATE – MLB.com has video of Obama…hopefully rectifying pitch-gate. The Fox clip clearly breaks away from the throw, but a frontal view shows that Obama just missed making it, and a nice catch by Pujols prevented a bounce. Video is here.

The NY Times adds: The last time Obama threw out the first pitch was before Game 2 of the 2005 American League Championship Series, so he was pitching on 1,371 days’ rest.

11:31 – Well, that’s the game. Another AL win and good news for us. Lots of questions about what it was like to meet Obama…probably wouldn’t have heard that in years past and I’m sure some conservative bloggers will take issue with this tomorrow. Mo is talking about Obama knowing about his cutter, but it sounds like he’s saying Obama knows about “quarters.”

Thanks to everyone who followed along tonight, to Brett, Dave, Ryan, Danny and Hyde for chiming in throughout the night (made my hands slightly less tired) and Lauren for dinner (and being a wonderful girlfriend and all that). In closing, I leave you with the creepy Taco Bell commercial mentioned earlier.

11:28 - Brett determines t hat Crawford’s middle name is “Demonte.” His initials are therefore CDC, making him a friend of several sororities we know. As if on cue, the 4th Flomax penis commercial comes on.

11:26 - Most of what Crawford said wasn’t in a language I’m fluent in. He looks like he might drop the MVP trophy bat.

11:24 – Surprise pick – goes to Carl Crawford for the game saving catch. Even he seems surprised.

11:22 - No clear MVP, but so far we all say Granderson.

11:20 – Dave, between tears – The Red Sox will enjoy their homefield advantage

Me – I can’t wait to play the Phillies

11:19 – Tejada pops up to very short right and its caught! AL wins 4-3, for 13th year in a row. Mariano has record setting 4th All Star Game Save.

11:18 - 2 outs, game on the line for PEDjada.

11:17 - Mo causes one of the ugliest swings I’ve ever seen, even against a lefty.

11:14 – Dave – Karma will come back to the Yankees, who danced around the dugout like little schoolgirls during that at-bat.

Buck says “pride of Panama”

11:11 – Nice catch by Werth ends the inning. We are going to the bottom of the 9th with the game on Mo’s shoulders. I’m sweating but confident.

11:07 – Dave – an obese copy editor I worked with guaranteed a Ryan Howard home run. He’s now so upset by these developments he’s chugging a bottle of mayo.

11:06 - Only Apple could get away with advertising “copy and paste” as a new iPhone feature. Who else would have the balls to take an old feature and brag about it? Anyone reading want to think of an analogy to this? I can’t imagine seeing an ad that says “Dell laptops…now with Ctrl-Alt-Delete”

11:05 - Ryan Howard, brought to you by the Heimlich maneuver. Still 4-3.

11:04 - Hudson steals 2nd. Although 1st is open, now they can throw junk to Howard. I’m nervous..4 out save for Mo isn’t the worst idea.

11:01 – Brett – K-rod is warming up. Should we pinch hit with Mo? He has a 1.000 career OBP against K-rod.

All Mets fans – ouch.

11:00 - Parting shot to Dave from Ryan ( a Phillies fan) – “I also would not trade Happ for Halladay…I saw him play last year a couple of times for the Lehigh Valley Iron Pigs (AAA-Phillies) and he is nasty.

You can’t argue with performance at the Lehigh Valley Iron Pigs level.

10:58 - Mo is warming up. Bud Selig has a flap of skin under his face that is rooster-like. AL breaks the retired-batters streak at 18 with a 2-out walk. Hopefully we/AL can get Hudson out to end the inning. Annnnnd..fail. Hudson singles and the tying run is at 3rd.

10:57 - Ryan checks in – “Stop saying ‘we’ about the NL. Also, be advised that cherry lane controls portion’s of ronan tynan’s publishing empire.” I would be a fool to cross CL and retract my mocking comments.

10:53 – Just looked at some of the blog stats. We’re at around 300 hits tonight which is awesome news. Then I checked the search terms people used to find the blog:

lincecum bionic arm?	11
tim lincecum bionic arm	8
lincecum bionic arm	5
tim lincecum and bionic arm	4
obama and ichiro	3
tim mccarver and artie lange	2
postsecret	2
101 in 1001	2
will ferrell daily show trumbull	2
does tim lincecum have a bionic arm	2

To quote the Sports Guy…yup, these are my readers.

10:52 - Delay while Lauren left. She is at least co-MVP for not only bringing dinner but putting up with baseball and this at the same time. Meanwhile, we scored on a a sac fly to make it 4-3 and set up a save for Mo.

10:42 - Curtis Granderson hits a bomb after Buck praises him, potentially erasing his curse. We now have a runner on 3rd with one out.

10:41 - Brett – Oh hooray. another malfunctioning penis commercial

10:35 - Brett – It’s odd to watch Papelbon give up bombs and root against them being home runs. Can I root for a line drive off his cup that is then caught on the fly for an out?

10:33 – Brett is now more supportive of the 7th inning stretch. Papelbon seems determined to give up a home run.

10:32 - Carl Crawford just saved a home run and got an acknowledgement from Papeldouche.

10:29 – Brett demands that we see Ronan Tynan perform the same song in the same outfit. Our eyes are thankful that this idea will never be implemented.

10:28 - God Bless America is now being performed by who the hell are you. Dave – I hate the god bless america. No idea if he means the song, the country, or just this performance.

10:26 – This game is flying by or dragging, depending on how you look at it. I hope something happens in order to avoid a repeat of the Milwaukee disaster.

10:21 – Fox camera pans to picture of robot from A.I. That was unusual.

10:19 - Pujols out after walking halfway to first. 0-3 with an error and he’s probably coming out. Definitely the best player in the game today.

10:18 - McCarver just said to Buck “Why didn’t you Tweet me that day?” He makes it too easy.

10:16 - Brett – This game is going by like the players heard the steroid testing guys are coming and they all want to get out of there

10:14 - Dave – A Phillies fan I work with just said he wouldn’t trade J.A. Happ for Roy Halladay straight-up. Please ridicule him publicly on your blog. Thanks.

My pleasure. Are you serious? Do you think potential will put you in the playoffs? Or hope?

I want to keep mocking him but one of the creepiest commercials I’ve ever seen has just come on for Taco Bell. I may sleep with the lights on.

10:13 - I left the room for 5 minutes and an inning passed. Edwin Jackson had one of the quickest ASG appearances ever. The game is now back on track for a quick finish, and Hamilton is on with a single.

10:04 - Pujols makes a great diving stop to save a run and end the inning. I hope he makes another error.

10:03 - Mauer lines a ball to left and Jeter legs out a run using his intangibles to tie the game at 3.

10:00 - Brett – Jeter compared to ralph trevsant. who the [sunshine] is ralph trevsant? Jeter grounds into fielder’s choice after a nice play and it’s 2 outs with Jeter on first for Mauer.

9:56 - Joe Buck – Imagine how much faster Carl Crawford would be with his pants pulled up? Joe Buck has a bigger fascination with the relative height of pants than anyone I know.

9:52 – Brett is home from work, which at this hour is un-American. He adds – McCarver just said that Victorino went campaigning door to door with Philly Mayor Michael Nutter in order to get voted into the ASG. In an unrelated story, murders are through the roof in Philly and the city budget is a mess, but the mayor has time on his hands.

9:47 – Greinke comes in for the AL..hopefully he can be lights out like normal. He is in the top 5 in all 5 major pitching categories.

9:42 - The game is moving quicker now..chance to finish before 1. Buck notes that Molina has 32 pickoffs this season so far. I wonder what Thanksgiving at the Molina household is like.

9:40 – Debating the gender of Dave’s new dog over the commercial break. Pictures to follow.

9:37 - Dave – Has Joe Buck talked about his second favorite website yet? (I can’t post it as this is a family blog)

9:36 – Tex is consistently one of the best fielding 1st basemen in baseball.

9:32 – Dave – Sorry i went MIA. I wonder if a strikingly handsome N.L. player broke up Halladay’s no-hitter and keyed a rally?

9:29 - Roy Halladay is interviewed and the mic goes dead. Thanks Fox.

9:27 – The NL is now leading 3-2 and the inning is over. We will come back..but nobody wants to give the NL hope. It must have been Obama’s fault.

9:23 - NL scores on a Victorino hit – Buck attributes this to the fact that both he and Obama are from Hawaii. IF OBAMA IS EVEN A CITIZEN!

9:22 - Lauren – Barack Obama is talking about baseball and I brought you pizza. How big a hard on do you have right now?

9:20 - Obama starts giggling when discussing the Nationals. Being mocked by the President who also lives near your stadium must feel good for them. Meanwhile, back to back singles for the NL with two outs.

9:19 - Lauren arrives with pizza! I am saved and will live through the next several hours.

9:18 - Buck references his Russia and Ghana trips and says he is happy to provide Obama with respite. They show a replay of his pitch as I leave the room for 5 seconds. Will this never end?

9:16 – Obama is in the booth with Buck and McCarver. They are asking him about the jacket. He said he’s wearing it because Michelle thinks he’s cute in it. Buck gives him credit for not remaining neutral.

9:11 – Lot of talk about a potential Halladay trade, even within the AL East. I’m too excited to focus. Now focused on Ichiro’s reaction to asking Obama for an autograph. They mention that Obama called Ichiro a Hall of Famer, and then Ichiro lines out. I’m convinced that the economy could be righted simply by Joe Buck saying it will crash.

9:09 - Each team is playing for charity. The AL is playing for the Boys and Girls Club. The NL is playing for the MLB Reviving Baseball in Inner Cities Presented by KPMG. Rolls right off the tongue.

9:05 – Buck/McCarver agreeing that Pujols is the best player in the game. Pujols promptly grounds out hard to Michael Young to end the inning. Joe Buck is like the Madden and SI cover curses combined when it comes to jinxes.

9:02 – Sperry wants to know what’s cut into the outfield grass. Quick search says it’s some kind of iconic old courthouse in St. Louis. Odd.

9:01 – Interesting stat from ESPN – The National League is undefeated in All-Star history (4-0) when a president or former president has thrown out the first pitch. The four years in question are 1962 (John F. Kennedy), 1970 (Richard M. Nixon), 1976 (Gerald Ford) and 1978 (retired president Ford).

8:56 – Jason Bay gets a hit also. It’s tough to be in this situation – wanting the Red Sox to die but AL to win. Bases are now loaded with good guys. Dave asks if Lincecum can cover first. My guess – no?

8:55 – At this rate, I will not be eating dinner ever. Tex hits a soft shot to the infield and Pujols makes an error! Jeter scores and the hometown hero has an error. Good start for the AL.

8:53 – Dave – Joe Mauer missed a couple of months and might have more home runs than the Mets. Joe Buck just called his swing pretty. BET UPDATE – if the AL wins, Dave is writing a long post about the Mets’ critical success in the playoffs over the last two years.

8:51 - Dave is calling for a Jeter strike out. And he’s hit! Is there no God?

8:50 - Ichiro starts the game with a broken bat hit, surprising no one. McCarver continues to say random stats to prove his relevance.

8:48 – Dave – If I dropped 2-3 pounds, I would have the exact same body type as Tim Lincecum. Hyde – McCain could have been sent out there in a wheel chair to throw out the first pitch. (I disagree – he remembers baseball’s invention and is probably over it)

8:47 – Sperry also noticed the palsy snub. Is this as big as pitchgate? Time will tell.

8:44 – HUGE UPDATE – Dave and I are going to wager on the game. He gets odds since the NL never wins. If the NL wins, I have to write a 1,000-word blog on Derek Jeter’s flaws. I asked him to write 1,000 words attributing the Yankees’ success to hard work, good draft picks and their farm system. He said that he will not write fiction. Zing.

8:39 - Tim McCarver says that Lincecum has a bianic…no…bionic arm. I am a long time commenter on the now-defunct ShutUpTimMcCarver.com – I will not let his nonsense go unrepeated here tonight. Dave is still too stunned about Pitch-gate to speak.

8:38 - We’re stunned – how do they not show the pitch landing…even on replay? Is this MLB trying to cover Obama in case of a bad throw, or Rupert Murdoch trying to hide his success? Nancy Pelosi should have the CIA look at this.

8:37 – Obama is announced! He is wearing jeans – he’s just like you and I! He’s wearing a Sox jacket – have to give him credit for supporting his team on such a big stage. The crowd gasps when he threw (like a girl) but he makes it over the plate. The cameraman inexplicably half cut away from the pitch, as if to cover his ass.

8:36 – Stan Musial is being driven out right now – 88 years old. Dave – Will this freaking game start before 9? Newspapers have deadlines! (in a related story, yes there are still newspapers).

8:33 – Dave thinks Ando from Heroes was in a commercial with Tiger. I got a commercial for the Wii so I can’t comment. Also, why is Family Guy doing a Cleveland spinoff? With a talking bear? Seth MacFarlane must be stopped. Dave disagrees with the Cleveland analysis

8:31 - Sheryl Crow sings the national anthem while a stealth bomber flies overhead. Unevenly testicled men everywhere rejoice.

8:26 – Nice moment – the players are spending time with the All Stars Among Us. Everyone is ignoring the teenager with cerebral palsy in the wheelchair. Oops.

8:25 – Dave thinks Kevin Costner should be talking. If you elect him, he will come. Obama is pushing Service.gov.

8:19 – Obama prerecorded a segment on baseball history. When did he have time for this? Bush II still looks confused but clearly did have time for this. Clinton seems like he came on the off chance that baseball would add cheerleaders. Bush I makes a points of light joke – somewhere Dana Carvey is laughing. Jimmy Carter looks terrible, he must have been spending too much time in the Middle East. Bush II is talking about a guy from Boston. Is that the single most aggravating set of nouns in one sentence?

8:18 -  Baseball salutes everyday heroes across America. Third honoree? Matt Kuntz. Stay classy, MLB.

8:15 - Albert Pujols, the hometown hero and king of the clean baseball players, is getting a rousing standing ovation. Joe Buck pauses to think of obvious unfunny puns to use later in the broadcast.

Dave – This lineup could not be more depressing for a Mets fan: 7 million phillies and the dude who beat them in Game 7 of the 2006 NLCS (Yadier Molina)

8:14 – When I decided to do this, I didn’t make any plans for dinner. I already had Chinese two days ago. Hopefully a pizza delivery man at Alba’s is reading this.

8:11 – From Dave – Will Obama’s first pitch make it over the plate? 95% of ESPN readers think so. Considering he reads Urdu poetry, he should be cool enough to make it on the fly.

8:08 – Mariano gets a strong ovation. Yankee nation has made it to the mid-west. La Russa, as expected, gets the loudest cheers so far.

8:07 – Joe Buck is announcing the starting lineups. Where is Artie Lange when you need him?

8:02 – The early promo shots have begun. We learned that this is the first time since 2001 that two Cy Young winners will be starting. Obama is in the locker room asking questions and not sure what to do.