Our best pitcher over the last two years can’t throw strikes. Our vaunted first baseman can’t hit the ball. Our best slugger is in rehab, loves to kiss himself, may or may not be on steroids and may have helped opposing teams. But at least no one’s mother was involved.
Until now.
Jacqueline Standley, from whose loins erstwhile starter Joba Chamberlain came, was arrested on charges of selling meth to an undercover officer in Lincoln, Nebraska.
The story highlights the always daring adventures of the Lincoln Drug Squad:
Police sent the suspected meth to the State Crime Lab, where it was tested and confirmed to be 0.6 grams of meth.
Joba released a statement praising his mother for using meth high and inside, his area of expertise.
When asked to comment, previous Standley customer J.C. Romero said, “I had no idea there was meth in this meth. Why didn’t someone put it on the label?”
(h/t to Ryan for requesting this story)
